In this day and age where online connectivity is so big one would expect people to feel less lonely but the contrary is true.
Loneliness affects millions of people and men even more than women. The UK is no different with devastating effects to men’s mental health of all ages.
According to a research for the Office of National Statistics (ONS) men are less likely to admit of feeling lonely than women yet feeling it all the same. In 2022 around 2.5 million men reported feeling lonely often or always and is believed this number only got higher since then.
Social expectations and stereotypes around masculinity play a massive role in understanding the affects of loneliness in men in the UK. Even if our parents don’t do it, as we are growing up the message is all around us, in our school yards, in the playgrounds, in our working spaces.
Boys and men don’t cry, are resilient and stoic, self-reliant, masculine and the list goes on. Showing vulnerability or ask for emotional help can be stigmatized making men to keep it in, put on a brave face and crack on with life. Inevitable this will make the feelings of isolation even stronger.
Loneliness is not a passing emotion, it has a massive effect on men’s mental health in the UK and across the globe. Feelings of chronic loneliness can lead in developing depression and anxiety, with the stigma around mental health making them reluctant to seek support from both professionals and friends, trapping them in a vicious circle.
The negative affects of loveliness go beyond mental health. It can seriously affect men’s physical well-being as well. Chronic feelings of loneliness are associated with an increased risk of cardiovascular diseases, weak immune system amongst many other health issues.
Men often we are conditioned to primarily look after our physical health and we don’t realize that our mental and physical health are intertwined. We can have a very healthy looking body but if we don’t look after our mental health as well our physical our bodies will inevitably become unhealthy from the inside.
Loneliness and its impact in our mental health can put a big strain in our existing relationships and also hinder the developing of new ones, both romantically and platonically. Lack of social support likely will lead to a bigger sense of loneliness and isolation as men will become even more withdrawn.
So what we can do about it?
In spite of loneliness being a massive issue within the male population in the UK I remain hopeful. Although there is still a long way to go, everyday I feel the gentle breeze of change in our society.
We need to keep normalizing emotional expectation, vulnerability and ask for help challenging outdated ideas of stoicism and masculinity.
Encourage the creation and participation in support groups like the Men’s Walk & Talk group I run in Medway (feel free to contact me if you want to know more) and support awareness campaigns to help break down stereotypes.
And don’t forget to not lose hope, everything may seem lost when we are in our darkest hour but the sun will always shine in the morning and someone will be happy you are still in the fight.